Not the ending I was expecting
Although there was a crowd gathered around the huge tree beside the house, I still felt terribly alone and scared. Within a few hours this house, with its many fond memories, had become a haunted house. Although I didn’t say anything, I was really hoping my parents would just hurry up and get us in the car so we could head back to the safety of our home. My Grandmother had just died a few hours before in one of the back bedrooms. Her body had been taken to the funeral home before I was ever even brought back to the house. The usually cheery mood that surrounded the house was replaced with a much more somber tone. It was the first time I faced a death of someone so close to me and it hurt, it hurt real bad.
My Mom was the oldest child. The nine kids of my Grandmother were a wide range of ages. Her youngest, my uncle, was only a year and a half older than me. We would play together all the time. But on this day playing was the last thing on my mind. I wanted to get home and I almost made it. Someone in the crowd turned to my Mom and said, “Why don’t you let Wayne stay overnight with Ronnie?” I didn’t say a thing, but inside I was screaming, “No! No! Don’t make me do that. There is death in there.” My Mom turned to me. I could tell she was really hurting and not really in the mood to make any decision like that. She said, “What do you think, Wayne?” Knowing how much my Mom had given up to do whatever she had to while my Grandmother went through her illness, I knew it was the very least I could do to help her out on this one. So, I spent the night at my Grandparents’ house.
About all I remember about that overnight stay was going to bed. My Granddad, Ronnie and I all slept in the same bed. We were all on our backs. I could not sleep at all. I remember hearing my Grandfather and Ronnie snoring while I was wide awake. I remember wondering, “How in the world could they possibly sleep at a time like this?”
My Grandfather made his living by working on the water. He would crab and oyster and sell his catches to the local crab houses. Fresh seafood was one of the benefits of this occupation. I’m sure this is where I developed my love for seafood. He had a really good sense of humor. After my Grandmother died, many times I would spend a week or two with him and Ronnie. He had an old pickup truck he used to drive around. Don’t tell my Mom, but sometimes when he went to the local store, he would let Ronnie and me ride in the back. I have so many great memories of my Grandfather.
A few months before I was getting ready to go away to college my Grandfather suffered a stroke and he was never the same. He was confined to a wheelchair. He would come to stay with us and since I was at a local community college I could help my Mom take care of him. I decided to take a little trip out to see my other Grandmother, who lived close to the college I was going to attend. I didn’t know it at the time, but my parents were also using that time to see if my Mom could take care of my Grandfather by herself. When I got back I was surprised to find out that they put my Grandfather in a nursing home. Although I didn’t know at the time why they did it, I have always wondered if things might have been different if I hadn’t gone to see my Grandmother. Once again hurt covered my heart the day my Grandfather passed away.
I have read a lot of biographies. In most cases the person I’m reading about dies in the end. I have found, especially in longer biographies, you grow to understand the individual better. Before I start reading a biography, especially a Presidential one, I sometimes have a preset opinion of someone. Very rarely does that opinion change when I get to the end, but I really do have a much better understanding of who they are and why they have done certain things. In a longer, more detailed biography, my favorite part is the last 100 pages. Usually by then they are wrapping up their life and you start seeing what was really important to them. You usually travel through their final moments and almost without exception I hurt at their passing.
His name was John Payne Todd and he would cause much grief to his Mom and Step-Father. His Mom would come from a Quaker family. As a devoted daughter she would follow her father’s instructions and marry a Quaker man when she was very young. They would quickly have two sons. But shortly after the birth of her second son, both this son and her husband would die of yellow fever. She was now alone with her surviving son John Payne Todd. Shortly thereafter she would meet up and marry this future President.
He was 43 years old and she was just 26 years old. Yet he fell deeply in love with her. He would also adopt John Payne. They would have no children of their own. He was from a well off family and his ability to do many of the things he did in our early history was because his father helped him financially. He would inherit most of his father’s wealth and going into adulthood he was very well off.
This Bible character was sitting on top of a high mountain. One wonders what he must have been thinking. The view was magnificent. As far as he could see there were lush fields and forests. It was like a dream come true. He loved his God and would try as hard as he could to live his life for Him. He would get overzealous at times and try to do things his own way, but most of us do that. Still, being zealous is the reason he was sitting on the mountain top.
To me, it is one of the saddest deaths in the Bible and it came to one of my favorite Bible characters: Moses. Moses was a man of convictions. When he got an idea in his head, it was full steam ahead. He probably had worked out the results in his head before he ever took any action. When he did act and people didn’t respond exactly how he expected, he would get deeply discouraged. But God sometimes asks us to be a little more patient than our desires allow us to be. When we react this way, God will usually step in and say, “That’s not how I told you to do it.” Some punishment usually follows. So it was with Moses’ last view of the Promised Land. By not listening to God earlier in his life, Moses was forced to settle for only a view of the Promised Land before God would shut his eyes forever.
John Payne Todd would cause his Stepfather, James Madison, such grief. He was an alcoholic and he ran up debt over and over again. He was always running into trouble, most of it self-inflicted. He could never keep a steady job. Madison would even have to bail him out of debtors’ jail twice and pay off that debt. He would even have to take out a mortgage on his beloved Montpelier and sell some land he owned in Kentucky to pay some of that debt off. Add into this the fact that Virginia suffered several years of drought and the Madison’s finances took a nose dive. After Madison’s death, Dolley would try to sell some of Madison’s papers, but was unsuccessful. She was force to sell Montpelier and their slaves. She lived in near poverty the rest of her days.
To this day I think one of the people my life has been most touched by is my Grandfather. Our country will long remember James Madison as the Father of our Constitution and will have to look in the back pages of his life to see the turmoil his stepson really caused him and Dolley. Even those who only read the Bible a little have heard of Moses and most of those memories focus on his strong leadership. Life isn’t about the end; it is about what we do with each and every day we are given.
As we get older we start to wonder how the world will remember us. Fortunately, history often paints a better picture of us than we actually feel we deserve. People cry at our funerals, say kind words and speak of loving stories. Maybe these reactions are the true reflection of the God who loves us so much.
Prayer: Dear Mighty Father, Life would just not be complete if we didn’t have those special people to touch it. Thank you for honoring me with the great people you have placed on my path. Please let me also be worthy of being that special person to others. Amen.
