I have a question
It was going to be one of those long nights. I could tell as I headed to bed. But sleep never came. I tossed and I turned. It was to no avail. Getting up in the middle of the night, I headed toward the living room. On my way out I closed the bedroom door so I wouldn’t disturb anyone. After all, it was bad enough that I couldn’t sleep, but why should anyone else have to suffer.
I walked into the living room and turned on one of the lamps that sat on a little table. Then I slumped into the chair beside that table. Strange thing, I rarely ever sat in that chair. It was one of those life turning events and a decision had to be made on which direction I chose to take. I was really torn.
Failure is a word very few like to associate with their life. It crushes you and if you let it rest in your soul it will eat you up. Here I was and failure seemed to be where I was headed. A life line had been extended to me. Now it was my decision as to whether I would grab it and head to the shores it offered.
I had decided to try to go into the plumbing business. Even though I had enough business to turn a profit, I wasn’t being paid for the work I did. My biggest builder, the one who owed me the most money, had just declared bankruptcy. The other builder I did work for, well, his checks would often bounce and the routine had become to run to the bank as soon as you got the check and hope there was still enough money left on his deposits to cover your check. There was no way I could keep the business going and it looked like I would have to close the business.
But just as I was about to give up I received a phone call from another large builder who said I had won the bid for a large project he was starting. That is why I was sitting in my living room that night void of sleep. Do I take another chance or do I just accept the failure and move on to something different?
I arose and headed in to my new born son’s room. There was a rainbow painted on the wall and it appeared to end at his crib. He was my little pot of gold. I leaned over the crib and looked at this precious gift. I was taught at a young age that men don’t cry. Sorry Dad, but a few tears slipped out. I realized that I couldn’t do this to my son again. The next morning I called the big builder and told him I couldn’t do his project because I was closing up shop.
When we started fighting for our independence as a nation, we were a pretty rough group of characters. None were probably rougher than the men of Massachusetts. These men were just tired of the disrespect the Mother Country, England, was showing them. Some felt like second class citizens and now tax after tax was being levied on them. They just weren’t going to take it anymore. A small band of men gathered arms and decided they no longer wanted to be called Englishmen.
This New England gang quickly came to realize that Britain was too big of a power house for them to fight alone. They figured other colonies must also be experiencing the same frustrations, so they looked for some help. John Adams, of Massachusetts, realized, rather quickly, that for any effort to be successful would require the participation of the largest and most populist colony: Virginia. When the delegates of the different colonies gathered in Philadelphia he suggested the tall, popular Virginian of unquestionable character be called upon to lead these renegades in rebellion. George Washington accepted the challenge.
He was the son of Joash and he was an Israelite. As he and the other Israelites overlooked the Hill of Moreh they saw a great many Midianites. In fact, this crowd’s numbers were described as a swarm of locusts. God commanded them to overtake the Midianites. The Israelites were far outnumbered. Then God told him that he had too many soldiers. “What?” I can hear him now, “I already am outnumbered and you think I have too many?” “Tell the ones who are scared to stay back,” God replied. Most of them were scared, but he did what he was told.
With his dwindled troops he told God he was now ready to go fight. “Wait, you still have too many,” God replied. “Take the ones who are left down to the river and have them drink some water out of the river. You will take the ones that cup the water in their hands and lap it like a dog with you. Those who kneel down and dip their face in the water to take a drink will stay back,” were the instructions. Imagine Gideon’s surprise when there were only 300 soldiers left. Some more instructions came. “Have them carry a trumpet, a glass jar, and a torch,” God told him.
“What about a weapon,” Gideon probably replied. “You won’t need them,” God would say. Gideon did as God instructed.
As they approached the Midianite camp God instructed them to blow their horns and smash the glass jars. This scared the Midianites to death. Then with the torch in their left hand and the trumpet in the right they were to charge toward the enemy. The Midianites were terrified and they started fleeing in all directions. They started swinging their swords in terror and without realizing it they were killing their own men. Thus, without a battle weapon, the Israelites had a commanding victory and did not lose a man. Everyone realized it was God, and not they themselves that lead them to that victory.
George Washington had a great victory in Boston. As the British ships left the harbor everyone was really excited about this idea of independence. A short time later, however, the British ships reappeared outside New York City. The British basically just walked into New York and took it over. Philadelphia was next on their list. Washington was losing battle after battle. The people of Philadelphia were scared and were fleeing. In fact, of those brave delegates who signed their names to the Declaration of Independence, there were only about twenty who remained. Most people began to think that Washington needed to be replaced. John Adams, the man who nominated him, was one of those who started doubting Washington’s leadership abilities.
Then, on Christmas night in 1776, General Washington led his rag tag group across the Delaware River and surprised the British. It seemed to be the turning point in Washington’s leadership of the Revolutionary War. When everyone gave up on George Washington, he never gave up on himself. Personally, I’m very glad he carried that confidence.
The years wouldn’t be many years, after I turned down the plumbing job with that big builder, when I would learn that he, too, would file for bankruptcy. It would be many more years before I would have enough extra paycheck to do anything extra. I always wondered why God didn’t answer my prayers when I asked him to save my business. The future would enlighten me to the reason. God had better plans for me and He knew all along how to accomplish them.
I’m sure George Washington had all the reasons in the world to question the loyalty of the Congress that sent him on the mission to guide these untrained soldiers into battle, even if it was against the most powerful nation in the world. Short enlistments, shortages of supplies, lack of funds to pay the soldiers, shortages of ammunition, defeat, and even the lack of support were everyday problems he had to deal with. I’m sure he asked, “Why me?”
Gideon led soldiers into a battle of sure defeat. No weapons and the huge size of the enemy army could offer no other option. Everyone would question his leadership if there was defeat. “Why me,” must have been his thoughts.
Our God is a God of the “Why me?” The timeline to see the answer to that question is His to determine. Having the faith to wait to see Him answer that question is ours.
Prayer: Dear Mighty Father, Help me in those times I cry out, “O, why me?” I can line up all the proof in the world that I don’t deserve it, but if it is part of Your bigger plan, I will not receive an answer until Your will is done. Please grant me that faith that can carry me through that sorrow. Amen.
